Months are breezing by and another June is done and gone for this year. I got to say this June has been pretty good. One thing in June I was looking forward to was Spider-Man 2. It opened yesterday and for the first time in I don’t know how many sci-fi/comic book movies I did not see it opening night. Generally me and Troy go and see these flicks and make his wife go see them with us.

Every time we drag Bob to see one of our dumb sci-fi/comic movies I just feel for her sometimes. And we have made her see some dogs. Both of them are quick to point out the movies I’ve been responsible for. Tank Girl being the number one bad movie I’ve made them go see. No matter what we see now I always hear “It wasn’t as bad as Tank Girl” if the movie sucked.

Looking back on it there are a lot of bad movies under our belt. I’ve been keeping the ticket stubs for the flicks I go to for the last four or five years now. It all started because Whenever we talked about what movies we had seen we could never remember the names of them. It’s because a lot of the movies the last few years have sucked really bad. Now lot’s of you won’t admit or just don’t know any better.

Here is a perfect example of what I call a bad movie for you. The King Arthur movie produced by that rat bastard Jerry Bruckheimer. This one just oozes suckiness. I don’t think I could stomach watching the trailer for this piece of shit one more time without having to vomit. I can’t wait to to see the Bruckheimer classic scene where the heroes of the movie walk onto camera side by side in a heroic manner. I can just see it in my head. Fuck Bruckheimer and Fuck his King Arthur movie. I got two words for you people ok? Fucking Excalibur, ok?

Troy called the other day and told me Wednesday didn’t look good for going and seeing it. He said Friday and I agreed. Now I had every intention to go see it without him yesterday. It’s supposed to be good. So good people are calling it the Empire Strikes Back of the Spider-Man movies. Now to me that means it really god damned good. I’ll be disappointed if it isn’t.

Spider-Man just always felt close to home to me. Here was this guy who wasn’t popular and he didn’t get the girls. And wham one radioactive spider later he’s a superhero. But the cool thing is Peter Parker’s problems didn’t go away after he became Spidey. He worried about making money, he still was unpopular, and he still had bad luck with the ladies. The guy just seemed almost like a normal guy except he had the proportional strength of a spider and could stick to walls and of course those awesome web shooters. And who can forget that with great power comes great responsibility?

Anyway I never did go see Spider-Man 2 yesterday. Something much better than Spider-Man came up. And while Spider-Man is one of my favorites I just guess there are some things more important. I can wait till Friday to see it. If it is as good as everybody says it will be worth the wait. I’ll find out Friday night if it is good as they say.

The following joke is my all time favorite. I often tell it making sure to scream out the punchline as loud as I can.

One hot day on a beautiful beach, a good looking male is going for his usual jog along the shore. But, on this day he stops and notices something new in his travels. A woman, is crying her eyes out. And he could understand why, the poor lady had no arms and legs , and was sitting in a lawn chair. He feels bad for her and stops his jog to see what could possibly be wrong with her and if he could help.

He asks, “Are you alright? I saw you crying and I couldn’t help but stop and ask you if your okay and if I could help.”

She says, “Well, Seeing as how I have no arms or legs, everyone is afraid of me, and I’ve never been hugged before, so Can you hug me?”

He says, “Sure, why not.” So the handsome stud hugs her. She stops crying, and he bids her goodbye and continues his run.

The next day he goes for his run again. Yet once again, he see’s the same woman with no arms and no legs sobbing to no end. Out of pity he stops his run and goes up to her.

He says, “Ma’am I couldn’t help but notice you were crying again, is there anything I can do to help you?”

She says, “Well,seeing as how I have no arm’s and legs, everyone is afraid of me, so If you wouldn’t mind, could you kiss me, I’ve never been kissed before.”

He says, “Sure, why not?” as soon as he kisses her, he bids her goodbye and moves on with his run.

The next day he goes for his run as usual, and notices the same lady with no arms and no legs, lying in her lawn chair crying again. Now he’s starting to get really aggravated, and frankly he’s not in the mood to deal with any of the hassle today. But, out of pity he stops his run and goes up to her yet once again and says, “What’s wrong? I’m really willing to help you out, if you would just stop crying, so tell me.”

So she says, “well, seeing as how I have no arms and legs, everyone is afraid of me, and I’ve always wanted to get fucked, so will you fuck me?”

An expression crossed his face that no words could describe, so she wipes the tears of her face, he picks her up and throws her in the water, Shouting out as she starts to sink into the water “Now your fucked!“

This sums up my sick sense of humor.

So it appears here in my neck of the woods we experienced an Earthquake! Check out the stats below (for those to lazy to follow a link):

Magnitude 4.5
Date-Time Monday, June 28, 2004 at 06:10:51 (UTC) – Coordinated Universal Time
Monday, June 28, 2004 at 01:10:51 AM local time at epicenter
Time of Earthquake in other Time Zones
Location 41.44N 88.95W
Depth 5.0 kilometers
Region ILLINOIS
Reference 15 km (10 miles) NW of Ottawa, Illinois
65 km (40 miles) SE of Dixon, Illinois
120 km (75 miles) WSW of Chicago, Illinois
190 km (120 miles) NNE of SPRINGFIELD, Illinois

Location Quality Error estimate: horizontal /- 8.1 km; depth fixed by location program
Location Quality
Parameters Nst=26, Nph=26, Dmin=195.6 km, Rmss=1.20 sec, Erho=8.1 km, Erzz=0 km, Gp=108.6 degrees
Source USGS NEIC (WDCS-D)

Wild huh? Mike from work said he felt it. I was apparently asleep because I didn’t feel shit.

It’s funny that you get used to a way a person looks. I’m really bad about this kind of thing. I look at life through comic book goggles. Every body is supposed to stay the same. A persons appearance doesn’t change drastically. Sometimes of course change is good. With any luck I’ll have more than a few changes in the not to distant future.

But my best friend Troy changed. And it’s something I kid him about. If you take a look at the picture below you will see (from left to right) Me, Bob (Troy’s wife), and Troy. Mind you that this was taken a long time ago.

I look the same. I haven’t changed much in a long time. Bob of course is a woman. And being like a woman she changes her hair often, from the length to the color of her hair. But that’s cool because it is a chick thing. Just as long as I’m not expected to notice a drastic difference. Now Troy has talked about shaving his head a few times. I’ve always laughed and never expected him to do it.

You see I’ll let you in on a secret. I’ve always thought of Troy as one of those mythical heroes. He’s got to be you know? He has been and always will be there for me. I’ve been nursed through so many stupid things I thought were so terrible at the time by him. I can’t even think how many times he’s helped me through the loves of my life and the tragedy I thought it was then. And he never has let me down even when it was over silly matters of the heart. even more so he’s never let anyone down. He is the greatest guy I know.

So it’s only natural for me to think of him just like poor old Sampson. In fact I’ve always thought that just maybe his hair was his source of power, just like Sampson. So I guess I’m getting superstitious in my old age maybe. It’s got to be it. I just worry I may need his wisdom again one of these days. But I know he won’t fail me. It’s not in his character.

And seriously man I dig the new do.

Man I’ve been waiting for this a long time. It seems they are finally putting the classic trek on dvd. Below are shots of the box and here are the details on whats on this 8 disk set includes.

This here is well worth the estimated 100 buck price tag. Man I can’t wait for this one.

Saw this over at Gawain’s and it just seemed so appropriate for me. Want to make a Turk? Just check out the recipe below:

How to make a Turk

Ingredients: 1 part competetiveness 1 part silliness 1 part empathy

Method: Stir together in a glass tumbler with a salted rim. Add a little cocktail umbrella and a dash of lovability

Personality cocktail From Go-Quiz.com

I replaced my old prehistoric cell phone with a slick flip top number I lovingly refer to as the T731. This thing has a color display and a number of little things that make me very happy. Number one being that names entered into it always capitalize the first letter of the name. I’m very easy to please like that. Also the ability (not the desire) to send text messages are now available to me.

Now the one and only thing I don’t like about my T731 is the fact that it has a flip open face that can’t really flip open. I’m a Star Trek Geek ok? I want to be able to flip this sucker open like Kirk did with a communicator in the original (and best) Star Trek. And of course asking for it to make the same noise as the Star Trek communicator is probably to much right?