Tonight the acting general manager asked me about how things are going. And I told him how it is. I told him that the place was a mess. I then asked him just long it was going to take him to find me a boss. It’s been two weeks already I reminded him. The chain of command is broken and the front desk is slowly falling apart.

I need a boss. Funny coming from me isn’t? But the thing is, who do I complain to? Who do I report the things I see that is wrong at the hotel to? Who do I call at 7:05 am when the first shift hasn’t shown up yet? I need that front desk manager for all of these things. Because when it comes down to it I always respect the chain o’ command. And I’ll be damned if I have to go over someones head. Even when there is no head I’m going over. It just doesn’t feel right. I shouldn’t have to be put in that kind of position.

I then expressed some thoughts on the current crop of possible candidates for the front desk manager gig. I hear things. I’m more informed than the hotel management can guess. I probably displayed just a little to much vehement disgust on the subject of one ex fdm that was in the contention for the job again. I made claims that I would walk out if that person got the job. I may even be prepared to follow through on that claim. And of course after I had expressed myself the gm asked me more or less why I didn’t apply for the job. My response can best be summed up with this movie quote:

After 12 years in the minor leagues, I don’t tryout.

Honestly you guys probably think I’m crazy. But it’s just really the way it is. Now while I don’t have Crash Davis’s good looks or charm, I do feel like I’m in his predicament. And that is why I told the gm I would never apply for the job. I told him he could offer me the job. Which of course went unanswered. I’ve worked at this hotel since I was a sophomore in high school. I don’t think that after all that time I feel the need to apply for something that they should have the common god damn sense to offer me.

Of course as it was pointed out in a conversation with a friend just the other day that is why I’m still a night auditor who makes less than nine dollars an hour. And I’m fine with that. I just have these crazy notions on how things should work. I fully understand that my idealistic expectations are just that.

And you know what else? Fuck them. While some of the management here at the hotel may not know me personally there are some that do. I know I have a personnel file going way back. Just by reading that these people “should” know to offer me the job. I mean for christ’s sake I’ve been fired from this shithole and then hired back by the same guy that fired me. If I didn’t know what I was doing I think I never would have made it back into the place.

No fuck them. If they did offer me the job I would (as I’ve stated before) laugh in their face and tell them no. The way things are now at the hotel I can’t imagine the money would be worth it. It would probably only be a grand or two over what I make now. And that’s just not good enough. No maybe in another time and another place I would have applied for the job. But that time and place is long gone. It’s only here and now unfortunately.