It’s been two weeks since I had a smoke. I have almost made it to the point that I don’t have any cravings for a cigarette. Almost. Every once in a while there is an employee or two that really gets on my nerves. Then of course there is the little things. Like your fingers stinking of nicotine. Or how your fingers turn a kind of weird color after some marathon runs of binge smoking at work. It’s shit like that I really don’t miss.
Don’t worry I haven’t turned into a non smoking evangelist. Hey if you smoke and you don’t want to quit, well don’t. For that matter I’m not certain I will stay clean. I have been listening to Denis Leary’s No Cure For Cancer. The reason I say I’m not certain I can stay clean is because nicotine is a drug. And I was addicted. But I’m trying. You have to want to quit. You have to really want to quit.
At least that’s how I feel. I’ve said plenty of times “I’m not going to smoke any more.” But up until now I didn’t really want to quit. Does that make sense? I also haven’t been to any bars for the last two weeks. That’s the trick for me. It’s the bars that will screw up my no smoking. There is something about drinking in a bar that makes me want to smoke. Again maybe it’s just me.
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